25 to Life: Elephants in the Room

25 to Life: Elephants in the Room

We are down to hometowns on The Bachelor and this time feels a little bit different than the other ones. We already know Rachel is a lock for The Bachelorette. We are also sure that Nick is definitely not emotionally ready for him to be so close to the end of this. He has spent so much time trying to convince these women that he isn’t a crazy person that he has done the exact opposite, convinced these women that he is a crazy person and forgotten to actually get to know them in the process. We start the show right where we left off with the dismissal of The Crown Princess Kristina and with Nick handing 4 roses to the rest of the women signaling them that it is time for a visit to their families. How nice of him for creating a dramatic situation and then squashing it in one fail swoop. Thanks bae.

Now on to the rest of the dates…

Raven – Hoxie, Arkansas

We head to Hoxie, Arkansas to hang out with Raven. This woman is more than meets the eye. Sure she loves to mud and ride ATVs and wrestle. She’s a regular Elly Mae Clampett. But she also went to law school and beat up her ex-boyfriend with a stiletto. I have no idea who this woman is, but Nick loves it a whole bunch. The two of them get into a little trouble with a cop, but hold the phone, its just her brother playing a mean southern trick on the two love birds. Hilarious.

Then we go to Raven’s home to meet her parents and of course they have the “traditional” meet and greet, but this time it is met with some good news. After a year of battling lung cancer, we learn on the show that Raven’s dad is now cancer free. This is big news. So big in fact that Nick is no longer the center of attention. Who cares if he even wants to marry Raven, her dad literally doesn’t have cancer anymore. Raven is so wound up by the news of the day that she doesn’t tell Nick that she loves him and rightfully so. She is so much smarter and more cunning than anyone things. She has slowly let information about herself slip through the cracks making her one to watch this season or even next season on BIP. I don’t think loving Nick is something she actually needs. I hope she saves those three lil’ words for someone who actually deserves it.

Rachel – Dallas, Texas

What a date and at a time like this. For a black person — a black woman in fact — who has never lasted this long on the show to have a hometown date that is so unapologetically African-American is huge. On the other hand, it was also a pretty uneventful date because we already know she’s The Bachelorette. For the viewer, the pressure is off. How do you create drama when there is none? Rachel starts the date by taking Nick to church. And not to any church, a BLACK church. For the first time to have shown someone taking their Bachelor / Bachelorette to church and have it to be a black experience is monumental. It gives us a soft glimpse into what Rachel’s season will be like and hopefully the producers do Rachel some justice. Nick looked a little uncomfortable at church, but warmed up to the idea that going to church with Rachel would be something that he would like to continue to do with their family one day.

She then takes Nick back to her home (he’s wearing a suit because he knows to come correct or not at all) where he meets her sisters and her mother. The Honorable Judge Lindsay was there for the date but was not able to be on camera. Also, he is a high powered judge that doesn’t take any crap from anyone. The family asks the big question that we all need to know, “Have you ever dated a black girl and are you ready for the magnitude of being in an interracial relationship.” Nick is very clear that he loves Rachel for who she is and not the color of her skin which is all well and good. He is noble, he thinks he knows what the experience is going to be like and her family chooses to trust him… for now. Do I think he means well, of course. There just isn’t  enough time for the show to really explore in a meaningful way the challenges of being in an interracial relationship. It’s hard to prove in a soundbite during a 20 minute segment that you aren’t racist. Wokeness is not lost on Nick, he just needs a little time to get there.

Corinne – Miami, Florida

We meet Corinne in her power place, the mall where she and Nick go shopping for thousands of dollars worth of designer items. Doesn’t she know that Nick gets an insane amount of free clothes on this show? Doesn’t she know that they literally have a stylist whose only job is to pick out suits for this goon? She doesn’t because she’s 12. Because Corinne is an experienced shopper, she knows every single salesperson at this place. This makes Nick nervous and he starts to get a taste of what life with Corinne will be like. Activities include: shopping and speaking in incomplete sentences where Corinne says things like, “I very love you.” Cute.

Next up we visit to Corinne’s home where we meet the infamous Raquel, a beautiful kind woman who has raised Corinne and her sister and been an important person to the entire family for 17 years. She also washes the dishes and clears the table as the rest of the family watches Nick and Corinne walk through the lobby of their complex. Don’t forget she still works for them. Corinne’s dad wants to know how Nick will provide for Corinne and her family. Does this boy have a job? If he is the one at home taking care of the kids, are  you ok with that? Two things, why are dads so bent out of shape about men staying home and taking care of the children? That sounds amazing to me. Also, Nick hasn’t had a job for 4 years and somehow he is living in Chicago on his own. I don’t want to know how, but he’s doing it. Listen, if Corinne can “run a multi-million dollar business,” Nick can figure out how to work for a living and I am saying work loosely.

Vanessa – Montreal, Canada

Vanessa’s experience was last and the most intense. We start off meeting group of special needs students who mean the world to her. I literally have nothing to say about this because it was just perfect. They love her and she loves them. She gets so much joy and energy and life from them and they get the same from her. We do not deserve Vanessa.

Then, we go to Vanessa’s family’s house where the rubber hits the road. They like Nick well enough, but they are VERY worried about Vanessa. Something about some breakup that was three years ago that devastated the entire family. Her mother and sister and aunt and brother are not into this guy coming in here and asking for her hand in marriage. They want to make sure she is making the right decision and they want to make sure she doesn’t get hurt. Her dad feels the same and reluctantly gives Nick the green light to propose. However, when Vanessa’s dad told her that Nick asked all of the parents and gave each one of the girls the, “Can I marry your daughter?” speech. Vanessa was shook. Has she ever seen the show? How could she truly be upset about this? Why isn’t she the one asking these questions? I love Vanessa, but these meltdowns are starting to come more and more often. I’m not feeling it.

We get to the end of the episode where Nick takes the women to New York to knock his number down from 4 to 3 for the last few 1:1 dates and Fantasy Suite evening. Nick starts spiraling trying to figure out who he is going to sleep with because the option of seeing 3 sets of boobs really can weigh on a man’s judgement. Suddenly, we hear a knock on the door. Who could it be? Is it Vanessa who wants to apologize? Is it Corinne who wants a quickie before the rose ceremony? NOPE. It’s Andi “The Dorf” Dorfman. My fave is back, y’all. But what does she want? We will find out next week.


xo Taylor


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