XO NM

Letting Go Of 2018

Letting Go Of 2018

2018 was a whirlwind. 

With so many highs and lows, I soon learned what it means to adapt quickly. I started January 2018 unsure of where my career was going, with small glimmers of hope. Little by little, I began booking more jobs and signing onto more campaign deals. 

I learned what it means to wake up and live your dreams. 

I learned another lesson in immense loss when we had to put Bronx down after less than a year. 

2018 forced me to grow up. It reminded me of my strength, and even tested it at times. Leaving your feelings at the door became the norm and taught me the importance of professionalism. In this town, everyone is going through something and, quite frankly, no one cares about your problems. 

After 4 years, I took a trip for myself. For 3 weeks, I explored the world and spent some time with myself. It was a healing trip for me and brought back my carefree spirit. 

One thing I forgot to deal with was forgiveness. I thought I had released so many feelings in 2017 and forgave people for hurting me, but I forgot to forgive on person.

Me. 

A friend of mine told me to write a letter of forgiveness before the year ends, so on New Years Eve, I sat with myself and thought about all of the things I needed to release going into 2019. I forgave myself at the top of the list. Then I forgave everyone I could think of that had caused me to have hurt feelings. I took my letter outside and set it on fire. And like an Adele song, I watched that sh*t burn to a crisp. 

It was so freeing. I suddenly felt lighter. 

Sometimes we are holding onto pain without even realizing we are doing it. If you feel like even a part of you may be doing that, I really recommend writing a letter to yourself and burning it. 

2019, I’ve been waiting for you. Let’s do this!

xo NM

 

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